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10 REASONS FOR BOOMER ISOLATION SHAME

boomer isolation

Your new room is ready. via www.businessinsider.com

More often than not, boomer isolation goes bad.

Who of your friends would you vote for as Most Likely To Be A Hermit?

Loosing touch with people doesn’t mean they’ve taken to boomer isolation. If you wonder, give them a call at the last number you have for them and see who answers.

If they answer, that’s your answer. Hermits aren’t bit on social connection. But wouldn’t you guess boomers would be the last to go hermit on society?

Communes, festivals, reunions, and now isolation?

Here’s why:

1. Moving to boomer isolation.

You need warm weather for the old bones so you move to a warmer climate.

It makes sense until you notice you don’t know anyone and don’t feel like breaking out the same stories you’ve told a thousand times.

Boomer isolation is better than repetitive boredom?

2. Death and boomer isolation.

If everyone doesn’t move away, they die. Or maybe they’re just dead to you. They said something, you said something, the friendship goes in the can.

You could try and reel them back in, but you’d rather wait for them to make the first move so you have the upper hand.

Not smart.

3. Fat shaming and boomer isolation.

Look in the mirror. If the image looking back resembles Little Face from the Dick Tracy, you’ve put on the pounds. It doesn’t mean hide away.

But everyone who isn’t in your everyday life brings it up.

“Looks like someone’s been at a desk job too long.”

“When is the baby due?”

“Is it sixty, or seventy, pounds since high school?”

Carry that fat shame long enough and you avoid the shamers.

4. Fitness shaming and boomer isolation.

Eat right, exercise, and keep a good attitude and what do you hear?

“You’re in great shape. Why weren’t you in shape when it mattered?”

“Wow, looking good. Did you get divorced? Are you getting divorced?”

“Why do you bother? You’re gonna die just like everyone else.”

The only people you know end up being gym people and they’ve got their own problems.

5. Education shaming and boomer isolation.

You decide to go back to school, take a few classes to sharpen up the old noodle, and what do you hear?

“Didn’t you already go to college? How much learning can you take?”

“You started college in 1973 and graduated in 1991. That’s three decades. Isn’t that enough?”

“Why would a know-it-all need to take any classes?”

If you’ve got an itch, you scratch. If you’ve got a question, you find answers. Anyone who doesn’t get it lives in a different isolation hole than you.

6. Appearance shaming and boomer isolation.

Whether you’re in shape, or the shape of an O, you still want to look good.

A nip here, a tuck there, a little botox, and you see yourself in a different light. Not so much others.

“Oh, are you a movie star now? What did you do to your face?”

“For all the work you’ve had done, why not lose a few pounds?”

“You want to stay forever young? It was a Dylan song, not a lifestyle.”

By 2016 we expect others have learned to mind their own business. Since they haven’t, you’ve dropped out of that social circle.

7. Friend shaming and boomer isolation.

Being the consensus fan you are, you try to include people from different parts of your life. Sometimes it works, then you hear about it later.

“You call those people friends? They are all Republican jackasses. Didn’t you know?”

“You call those people friends? They are all Democratic jackasses. Didn’t you know?”

“Do me a favor and don’t invite me to anything you invite those other people to.”

Nothing shuts the door faster than political discussion, especially when someone leans way in to ask why you can’t see the same truth as them.

True or not, you’re feelings end up trampled. You don’t get than in isolation.

8. Family shaming and boomer isolation.

No matter which end of the economic scale, or social ladder, someone has an opinion.

“I didn’t know you come from such pretentious people. They are hilarious with their big, fake, facade of manners.”

“Which end of the trailer park did your family come from? My God, I’ve only seen people like that on television documentaries.”

“Have you noticed how poisonous your family is? They’re not funny, but they think they’re funny. I’m surprised anyone could see straight after living with them.”

You hear this talk and know a better person would defend family honor with violence, but the best person walks away. So you do.

9. Self shaming and boomer isolation.

You could have tried harder, been a better parent, better spouse. Instead of working through how to be a better person, you beat yourself up.

“I’ll never be as good as my dad, and never was. I couldn’t carry his lunch for him.”

“My mom would have liked me better is she got to know me, but she spent her time with her friends instead of me.”

“I never took a chance. I should have joined the Army and been all I could be. I should have gone to college and got a degree. I should have looked for a better job when it was in front of me.”

When life delivers body blows, you go down for the count. When you deliver body blows to yourself, you hide.

10. Mental health shaming and boomer isolation.

Isn’t that what we’re talking about? Mental health? If you’re shamed for anything and accept it, you might need help.

If strangers make hurtful comments and you take them to heart, you might need help.

You figure all salesmen are fakes with their fake smiles and welcome handshakes? That’s a you problem.

You figure all religion works to lower your guard and brainwash you? AnotherĀ  you problem.

In a world geared to make you less, it’s your job to know the difference.

You’re more or less the same person you’ve always been.

And that’s good enough.

PS: If you catch yourself knocking people down instead of helping them up, you’re part of the boomer isolation problem.

Shame on you, boomer.

About David Gillaspie

Comments

  1. Mark M Mullins says:

    I think you hit all eight cylinders. You’re still you, just a little more cynical. Eh, what the hell, who isn’t?

    • David Gillaspie says:

      The link to Time Magazine’s isolation column promoted the non-isolation life.

      The key to a good life aging forward is social engagement, which I agree with, but sometimes taking one for the team doesn’t make everyone a winner. For example, what if the team is full of people who were cut from the travel squad of their last team?

      At some point the home team starts staying home, which is a choice, but still important to go when you got to go.

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