FAMILY LIFE: HOW IT STARTED, HOW IT’S GOING

Family life is a blur. That’s what I tell anyone who asks. It goes by fast from the dad lane.

Pictures don’t lie.

What’s it take to keep family life together over the long haul? Communication tools, that’s what, but not the kind you’d expect, not the kind my wife would include either.

But, it’s my blog, so there’s that.

Communication tools start with quality gear. Use what works best and improve.

If you’re a dad and you feel the wife and kids slipping away, tuning you out, do you listen better and adapt, or do you start tightening things up, beginning with yourself?

See the yellow thing in the picture? It’s a stud finder. You know how that works? It always points to you, right? That never gets old.

Reestablish who you think you are, then be a better listener. You might hear from others that you are who you think you are, stud. But don’t let it get you down.

The red thing is a set of drill bits. When communication breakdowns happens, which is an everyday event in sassy families, you need good tools to drill down to the real meaning wives and kids are trying to get across.

Sometimes it’s a small, tiny, drill bit, other times an auger.

After you drill down and figure things out, pull the bit out slowly. The thin ones easily break off, the big ones tear things up on extraction if you’re not careful.

And never drill too deep. Mark that bit for depth control.

The socket set at the bottom is for tightening up loose nuts in the family. It’s not a torque wrench, so don’t over-tighten.

It also loosens.

A Place To Ponder Family Strength

Staying on the ball with your communication skills means you’re got the tools of the trade, but are you organized?

Do you keep disagreements on topic and work toward a solution? That’s the healthy path.

Or do you take the occasion to puke up every petty grievance over your whole life and blame it on one person?

Either way, you need storage, drawers and shelves of storage. You need storage for the communication tools you have, and room to expand for those you’ll need.

Heavy Lifting For Family Life

For even for the saltiest veteran, family life can feel overwhelming. It’s a ‘carrying the world on your back’ sort of feeling.

How’s your back?

Better be a strong one, because you will carry the weight of the world on it, starting with your world and those in it for the long haul.

After you’ve solved family problems and put the tools away, approach the Squat Rack. It’s also a Bench Rack with Olympic Bar. Test your strength.

Because of the huge responsibilities you’ve shouldered, avoid hitting Personal Records. Don’t even think about it, but if your mind wanders into, “benching 350 lbs?” hustle to the tools and drill yourself in the melon.

At an unmarked deflection point, personal record attempts turn into life long injuries bordering on disability. No one wants that on their resume, brother.

Curate The Proper Attitude

With the right experience you’ll eventually be adequate at family life.

You’ll think you’re doing great, but with all of the uncertainties everywhere, find adequate on your radar.

Adequate gets you on base, moves you to second, then to third base waiting to slide home.

Family life doesn’t need a ‘quality time’ big moment where you walk up to the plate in your #3 Yankees shirt, call your shot, point out into space, and launch a home run ball out of the park.

Instead of a fat man on skinny legs trotting the bases, show you know the game. Run on a dropped third strike call; know how far to lead off without getting picked; break up the double play at second.

Let’s review.

Family life takes time and tools. The time part is all the time because no matter where you are you’re going to feel like you should be with your family.

The tool part we’ve covered. So, that’s how it started.

This is how it’s going:

Mother’s Day, 2020, when we learned we’d be grandparents, which explains the shocked looks of happiness.

(PS: Wear a mask for continued family life.)