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blog about nothing

These states read a blog about nothing. Is yours on it?

The biggest problem with people coming to America is they show up without a good grip on their new place.

How can anyone expect immigrants and refugees to know American states?

Some of them come running for their lives. They’ve been on the track for years.

Do they care about where they’re going as much as where they come from?

In the spirit of world peace, and domestic tranquility, I’ll break it down for them.

Oregon is dark blue. It’s my home base and inspiration, though I’ve lived on both coasts and traveled through most of the rest.

Except for states east of the New York/New Jersey line, along with Arkansas and Kentucky, I’ve seen a good chunk of America.

Note to potential new citizens: it’s not all the same no matter what you’ve heard or read, although this map suggests different.


In 1972 the sitting President up for re-election ran the states.

Nixon showed his Republican reach over the challenger McGovern with a sweep.

Impressive engagement?

blog about nothing

image via business insider.

If this was a blogger map and Nixon was the writer he’d be king of all blogs.

1972 was a big year in politics. Along with dominating the electoral landscape, President Nixon also sealed his fate with Watergate.

Win big and win fair, or go down in flames.

And he did.

America got President Gerald Ford after the Nixon resignation.

New arrivals to American shores need a sense of fair play to succeed to their wildest dreams.

So do bloggers.

No one shows up and goes straight to the head of the class.

We call that a pipe dream, as in put down the pipe and get to work, dreamer.


This American blog about nothing goes against the grain like the Seinfeld show about nothing.

It’s about everything new people need to know to move forward in their new home.

Don’t screw things up more than they are. You don’t want to be a Nixon and p!ss it all away.


The State Of A Blog About Nothing

Google Analytics is the gold standard of blog engagement and forecasting.

If the numbers are right, you’re golden.

The most important stats range from four, to ten, to all of them.

I go with two for marking the blogger territory for a single writer blog:

  1. Average Session Duration
  2. Pages/Session

The ASD clock for all states on the map runs to 2:56, enough time to read a post. Or five if you’re an Evelyn Wood speed reader.

During their time on-site they read an average of 3.57 pages.


The Oregon numbers lead all with 5:30 average session duration on 4.89 pages.

What does it mean? (Read it Forrest Gump style, Jenny.)

Only that Oregon is the the smartest damn place in the entire United States with the best blog readers across the land.

Dear New Arrivals,

Be more like Oregon,

best regards,



Voting Map Changes

Image via


In probably the only compiled stat, California is runner-up to Oregon.

They show up for two and a half minutes to read two and a half pages.

Blame the fast pace of life down there. They come for the synopsis, not the whole story.

Hollywood screenwriter style.


For the West Coast sweep, Washington shows up for :32 and reads 2.92 pages.

It makes sense when you add Microsoft and Amazon and OfferUp to the picture.

Huge money job people gitt’er done faster.

Wouldn’t you expect Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos, and Nick Huzar to be fast readers of a blog about nothing?

They’ve got lots on their plate with lots in their wake.

Just like you. Not that thirty seconds is too much load on any day.


The top map shows a nice coastal bracket around a good chunk of the middle.

No Michigan or Ohio, though. The Rusties would love Oregon beach posts.

No North Dakota, Iowa, or Oklahoma either. Yet.

What can the Mountain/Desert Near West gain by lighting up their state on my map?

First you can thank me for identifying your region. You’re not all mountain or all desert, you are the new Near West.

Not to be confused with the Northwest.


In a true to form stereotype, my hometown readership sits #81 on the blog about nothing city list.

One reader. This is all familiar stuff to the rest.

Except it’s not with so many shared lives rich in experience and feeling, but held back by social code.

Go ahead and break that code, hacker.

About David Gillaspie


  1. […] it were possible to switch I’d have more readers in more states and there would be fewer states of pre-existing […]

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