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How To Black Friday In WA SQ Like Boomerpdx

It’s Not What You Think If You Know Where To Go

via huffingtonpost.com

via huffingtonpost.com

Always start at Penny’s. You’ll save more there than Nickel’s or Dime’s, but not Dollar.

Come in on Tigard’s Greenburg Road. There’s no more traffic than the usual stop light highway near a freeway off-ramp.

Park on the edges for no crowd.

You’ll see people standing near cars on their phones saying, “We’re on the other side of Penney’s.”

Walk past. There’s more interesting things happening inside.

The mall air rushing out the door as you walk in would floor the common germ-o-phobe, but not you.

Once you get into the mall mainstream, take note of your companion’s coat color. You’ll be separated eventually.

Avoid ‘Panic In Washington Square.’

One dad said to his daughter and her friend, “Okay, you can go for half an hour. I’ll meet you back right here.”

Hasn’t he seen Taken? Does he remember the color of her coat?

A stylish woman walked past in what looked like an Air Force flight suit. Bad choice for the WA SQ jungle.

Stopped for a Starbucks coffee, but the long line kept us moving to the next place. No line at the E-bar outside Nordstrom’s. That usually means sub-Starbucks coffee, but not his time.
Great drip coffee.

A well dressed man stood in the middle of mall traffic shoveling food from a fridge container into his mouth. The same thing as eating a hotdog, or did he need a seat?

If Black Friday didn’t bring in shoppers, the Hollister store looks like a night club. It’s the opposite of the Big Box Store experience, but they still don’t serve alcohol.

Overall, the mall walk on the big day showed a different Oregon than the one from the recent census report. Black Friday is a chance to join the rest of the world in a Portland suburban mall, a dip in the American melting pot of shopping.

Overheard five steps inside Penny’s on the way out when a Boomer man-in-charge hooked his date’s arm:

“Okay. Let’s head back to Nordstrom’s,” like he was lost.

Hey pal, Penny’s is cool again. Don’t you watch TV?

Why don’t you head over to the Tesla store and check on a deal there?

About David Gillaspie
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