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Johnny’s facebook scroll down digit. image via


Connect the dots on a facebook scroll down? Don’t think twice, it’s alright.

Start with video of an African sunset. Always a comfort, always a big treat from National Geographic.

But an African sunset with zebra and impala? Hell, no.

#1. Where are the lions? Aren’t these beasties on their menu?

#2. If they’re on the lion menu, so are you. And the animals are pissed.

The biggest Africa story on yesterday’s facebook?

A big game hunter killed by big game. Elephant roll-over.

#3. A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh, a-weema-weh, a-weema-weh
A-weema-weh, a-weema-weh, a-weema-weh, a-weema-weh

I like sunsets, just not in the morning.

It might be the end of the day in a live shot from Africa, but who needs another sundown so soon?===

‘Photography Tips’ fishing for likes with a post about changing camera settings for better pictures?

Dear Photo: We know we suck with a camera, that’s why point and shoot is king. Throw in a little telephoto, some formatting, and about a million choices of photo-enhancing software in a hundred dollar costco camera?

Perfect pictures every time on an African sunset photo safari.


The New York Daily News shows the cropped Vatican photo of the Pope, President Trump beside his First Lady, and his daughter.

Asking, “What Were They Thinking?”

Three of the four have the proper medieval look, ladies in black with funeral headgear, the Pope in white robes. They’d fit in any Renaissance painting.

President RickyBobby stands there with a ‘How do you like me now’ buffed up grin.

That’s our guy out in the bigger world. In a word, consistent.


This is where I’m impressed by my facebook scroll down. The AI part, Advertising Intelligence.

The next post is Slate with an image of Trump and the Pope standing together, one devilishly impressive as the other is dour.

Two Pope/Trumps in a row. Coincidence, or lefty targeting?

Yahoo News makes it three in a row showing the First Lady and Pope Francis shaking hands.

And the Pope asks, “What are you feeding this guy?”

Dear Pope, does the FLOTUS look like Ronald McDonald? Ask him.


Time Magazine posts the question, “Do you ever wonder what happened to your class valedictorian?”

Only one, and I know what happened to her.

She graduated the top of her high school class like all of the other valedictorians in the district, but also ahead of them.

With the crown of Valedictorians’ Valedictorian she won a full ride academic scholarship.

It lasted a year if you round up, almost a term if you don’t.

Something happened, she dropped out, and gave up the school money.

She went home with a plan for a different college she knew her daddy would pay for.

Then the Crash Of ’29.

Grandma Marshall loved telling her college story, including taking classes fifty years later and setting academic records at the local community college.


What conclusions come from a facebook scroll down?

If you see the same thing posted on every other site you scroll past, it tells you who you are.

The connections you make between the posts won’t grow stronger, you don’t get that with an easy confirmation.

What will get stronger is the ability to reach out, to find story connections from a google/facebook universe.

They’re out there if you dare.



During her gap year Elizabeth Jane traveled alone to Africa.

“For the sunsets,” she said. “I’ve seen pictures of zebras and impalas at sunset after another day of life, and I need to share it.”

No one argued.

She hopped off a plane, then a bus in the middle of no where, and took a wrong turn into a managed hunt crossfire.

A guide’s party spooked an elephant herd and one of them charged her.

The guide fired. The wounded elephant gave a mortal scream, changed direction, and crushed the guide with a fuck you death roll.

The Pope and President Trump sent prayers.

Elizabeth Jane sent selfies.


A GQ post about Star Wars: The Last Jedi ties it all together with Mark Hamill wearing a different version of pope robes.

About David Gillaspie
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