OREGON BEAUTY FROM EVERY DIRECTION

Oregon beauty starts with a walk out my front door.

This is the view if I find the right spot, which I always do. (It’s not a mystery.)

I think it would be a better without the trees, without the house, but that’s not how things work.

That’s not how change happens, by wishing things away.

But, it’s a start.

From a geological perspective, if I want to see Mt. Hood better, I’m not moving the mountain.

You know it, I know it, but do Criss Angel and David Blaine know it?

The only magic that improves the view is moving to a new place, one with a clear view.

If that’s not enough Oregon beauty, maybe you don’t know Oregon beauty.

Oregon Beauty: Portland

People come here, park their car, and walk around downtown.

Yes, they’ll walk around tents and trash and and people crashed in doorways, that’s the Portland picture we’ve all seen across media.

Portland, City In Flames.

And it’s true. But, it’s not new.

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I had a Portland Moment walking past Mary’s Club in the old location on Broadway one night.

A man stopped me at the door to sell me weed, aggressively, like he knew something I didn’t, like I needed to buy his weed RIGHT NOW, RIGHT HERE.

He looked jumpy as hell, so I watched his hands.

Instead of ignoring him and running off, I took a moment for civic discourse, a chance to help another citizen find a better way.

Was I standing my ground? Naw, just contributing to the community.

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First, I wanted to re-direct to calm this fucker down.

Me: Do you see where you’re standing? It looks like blood drops. Are you bleeding?

Look man, this is a strip club and you’re selling weed under the neon lights. Either you’re the worst hustler in Portland, or you’re a cop.

If I had to bet, I’d say cop because you look too smart to be this dumb. But you get guys like me to bite, right? Then I’m arrested like a King Pin?

Come on, man. Do better.

Dealer: I can’t work Pioneer Square, or Portland State, or Waterfront Park.

Me: So Mary’s Club? Are you a pimp?

Dealer: Pimp? Do I look like a pimp?

Me: I don’t know what a pimp outside a strip club is supposed to look like, so maybe?

Dealer: I’m a business man doing business with the highest return based on the lowest legal penalty: Selling weed.

Me: Well, when you put it like that . . .

Around Every Portland City Corner

On the right days Mt. Hood is around every corner.

You’ll see it driving into town on Hwy 30.

It pops out on I-5, but don’t look when you’re in the Terwilliger Curves.

The “Terwilliger curves” is the name given to a 1.7-mile (2.7 km), six-lane section of Interstate 5 (I-5) in Portland, Oregon, known as one of the most dangerous stretches of highway in the state. Named for its physical characteristics and proximity to Terwilliger Boulevard, it first opened in 1961 and soon became known for its high crash rate. 

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I had a Portland Moment one morning on the drive into town.

On a left bend in the Terwilliger Curves a small car hit the meridian separating north and south lanes, climbed the short wall, and flipped over on its roof.

The wall is designed to keep crashed from going into oncoming traffic.

I was the first car behind it and hit my brakes while debris from a fifty mile an hour roof slide bounced off of my truck. It felt like I was an onboard camera behind a NASCAR crash.

I stopped, traffic backed up, and I looked inside to see a baby seat. I yelled in.

A man’s voice in a Scottish accept answered back.

Are you alone?

Yes.

Can you move?

Just a minute.

In a blink, a skinny Scotsman crawled out of a crushed window and stood beside me.

You’re not dead? This looks like a killer crash.

No, I’m not dead but I can’t say as much for my car.

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On this Sunday, find a small moment to admire Oregon beauty.

Take a look around and know you won’t find the same views anywhere.

Portland river and mountain?

Portland volcanoes in the city limits?

Portland beaches in the city limits?

Now I’m thinking of taking a walk over the Hawthorne Bridge, down to the promenade, across the Steel Bridge, and up Waterfront Park for a Portland Lap.