AN HONEST TRUTH TRICK FOR YOUNG AND OLD

Young people in their 30’s want the honest truth.

They ask me, “Is that true,” after I oversell a rare authority statement. Since they know my main fun in life is showing them how gullible they are, they ask.

And, if they ask and it’s not true, I say it’s not true. If it is true, I say look it up. I’m happy when they catch me, and a little sad. Either they’re getting smarter, or I’m running out of material.

Before I’m completely out, I’ll share an honest truth trick. I tricked my kid at a weigh in. After we weighed, I bet I’d lose twenty pounds overnight. Next morning I weighed 20 lbs less.

I did it by putting the floor scale in front of a towel rack. I stood on it with my hands behind my back, pulling down on a hand towel the kid couldn’t see.

We both agreed what the scale registered and I stepped off. He paid up, but wanted to check the scale again. I said no.

“I didn’t lose twenty pounds last night and you know it, I know it. But we both saw the number on the scale. You saw it and now you don’t believe it? I’ll pay you ten dollars if you figure it out.”

He didn’t, then got pissed when I told him the towel trick. “Why would any decent father cheat their kids?”

I handed the ten back and told him to sharpen the fuck up, it’s a lovely world full of beautiful people, also a tricky world full of tricky people, and I was being a decent father by showing some trickery.

Then I snatched at the money and missed.

That’s the Towel Weight Loss Trick.

Remember, make the bet, weigh in, collect winning. Then make another bet that the victim can’t figure it out.

Leave a comment if you try this honest truth trick. Or if you get kicked in the leg when you do.