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Boomer Exercise Translations, pt 2

Get Strong, Stay Strong. But First, A Cup Of Tea.

Continued from Part 1. (From the original English.)

via Check it out.

via Check it out. listed twenty things exercise does.

Baby boomer fitness works right in there.

Those three words, baby and boomer and fitness, have become code for erectile dysfunction.

Does exercise help ED? How can it hurt?

10. Helps with serious mental disorders.

Focus, effort, and hitting goals aren’t for everyone, but if you’ve got mental disorders it can’t hurt. Draw that picture and put yourself in it.

11. Reduce silent strokes.

Have you ever worked out so hard you feel like you’re head will pop? You see a blip in your vision with every heart beat? You need to break a sweat to get the exercise stroke benefit, but check your pulse.

12. Alzhermer’s protection.

The English report says exercise produces a certain chemical protection. Does it? Keep working out while you do the research. If you discover there’s no benefit, keep working out.

13. Improve children’s school performance.

Imagine two children having a disagreement in the classroom. One of them feels cheated by the teacher-imposed solution. She can’t sit still for wanting a better result. Then the class goes out on recess and plays a game. One kid get’s his shirt ripped. The first kid settles down and pays attention the rest of the day.

14. Stimulate brain cell growth.

How often do you hear athlete’s interviews go sideways with, “Like, you know, it’s sort of, if you catch my drift, a great time.” Your brain works differently. Probably hasn’t been rattled as often. Whether you get smarter or not, exercise creates the possibility. Try and not get carried away.

15. Increase executive functioning.

Good for the multi-tasking leader with laser focus. Check out the executive line-up and see who is a lean, mean, decision making machine. Invest accordingly.

16. Better sleep.

The great Vince Lombardi was credited with treating all his players the same. Like dogs. Workout like a mad dog and you’ll sleep better. If your partner accuses you of flailing around and stealing all the covers, don’t tell them you were dreaming of chasing rabbits.

17. Prevent migraines.

In England it’s pronounced ‘mee-graine’ but the pain is the same. Do you want more pills or most exercise? Find a bike to ride.

18. Stop smoking.

Do you smoke and not work out? If you smoke, the least you can do for yourself is workout. You’ve read about all the smoking attributed health problems. There’s plenty in this article. Get your walk on and see what your lungs were built to do. (Note: they weren’t built to suck down organic burners.)

19. Reduce motivation to overeat.

This one is easy. You feel smarter. You sleep better. Your executive decision-making grows razor sharp. Now back away from the Cheetos, boomer. Drop the cookie sack. Listen to your body when it says, “Hey, fat boy, push away from the table.” At a trim 240 it’s a faint voice, but I hear it.

20. It’s fun.

If it was fun loading up, why shouldn’t it be fun loading down? Because you’re not eating and drinking like a nut with the kooks you call friends. That’s always fun, but now it’s time to get serious. Your good time friends call less the more you can’t hang out. It’s a sad consolation, but chances are good you’ll be attending their memorials. When you do, keep the ‘I told you so’ to yourself.

Check out the original list here.

Before you begin, you should to see a doctor.


About David Gillaspie
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